The other morning, I got out of bed and faced myself in the bathroom mirror. My hair was tousled, and my face and neck were creased from sleeping on my side. I found myself zeroing in on all of what I felt were flaws. With tunnel vision, I focused on the wrinkles and the unattractive skin texture. Not how I wanted to present myself to the world. I immediately felt as if a wet blanket had been draped across my brain. “Wait a minute!” I said to myself. “This is a bit extreme, don’t you think?”
I decided to do a little experiment—an intervention on myself, you might say—to see if I could shift my feelings. I focused on one thing I like about my neck: its good muscle tone.
As soon as I focused on that, my emotions shifted. I felt better. The negative thoughts about my body went away, and I felt lighter and happier. That one thing was all I had to do to change how I felt.
Individuals with anxiety and mood problems have hard-wired attentional biases. Attentional bias refers to the tendency to pay attention to some things while ignoring others. In daily life, people with anxiety pay more attention to negative and fearful information than to positive and neutral information. And they do this more than nonanxious people. To be clear, I’m not talking about situations where actual danger is present. In fact, the hallmark of all anxiety and related disorders is the presence of fear and anxiety about situations with no actual threat or danger.
Stop for a moment to consider your own attentional biases.
For example, what crosses your mind when you hear a siren? Do you zoom in on fears of a loved one being hurt? Or do you feel lucky you are OK and assume your loved one is as well? When your partner is late, do you assume an accident occurred? Or do you think something benign came up? When you don’t immediately receive a response from a colleague about an important email you have carefully composed, do you assume they thought it was poorly written and you missed the boat? Or do you wait for their response before you draw negative conclusions?
If your brain goes through each day prioritizing negative and fearful information, it makes sense that you will perceive life as a minefield of danger and discomfort. Furthermore, if your brain gets stuck in these negative and fearful ruts, you won’t consider the more positive, less dangerous aspects of a given situation.
To make matters worse, people with anxiety problems often believe their safety and well-being depend on their ability to identify every single threat. These are not conscious choices; of course they don’t want to get caught up in these dynamics.
To help my patients better understand attentional bias, I ask them, “How many for-sale signs did you see on your way to my office?” Or I might ask a younger person, “How many people wearing brown pants did you see at school today?”
Usually they will say they can’t answer that because they weren’t paying attention.
Then I ask, “What would happen if I promised to pay you 10 dollars for each sighting?”
Of course, that would shift their attention and give them a reason to be laser-focused on spotting every sign or every pair of brown pants.
Not every anxious person fears and notices every stimulus that could possibly be perceived as threatening. Whatever type of anxiety problem you have will determine what your brain will look for. For example, if you struggle with perfectionism, you might over-check your emails and written projects but be unfazed by a filthy, disorganized office. Or if you hold yourself to unrealistically high standards about your physical appearance, you may zero in on perceived physical flaws, like I did. Or, to give yet another example, if you have social anxiety disorder, you might be on the lookout for negative facial expressions from others.
The effects of attentional bias vary from person to person. Some people have only a momentary reaction, then process what they observed and correct their perception—like I did when I looked in the mirror. Others, who have anxiety or mood problems, are slower to disengage their attention from stimuli they perceive as threatening or negative. Instead, their attention narrows and they are unable to notice less negative or fearful aspects of a situation.
If you are in the latter group, the following exercise can help you begin to shift out of the fearful or negative perceptions that make you feel bad.
You can do the following experiment on yourself. I have listed six common examples of negative attentional bias. Each is followed by a suggested practice to counteract it. Pick the examples you identify with and try the recommended practice. The more you practice, the more this will become second nature.
1. You often find yourself preoccupied with critical thoughts about a classmate, coworker, or romantic partner. You feel negative, distracted, and irritable with that person.
Practice: Instead of marinating in misery and negativity, think of one thing about the person that you respect, admire, or appreciate. Repeat, as needed.
2. You hold yourself to high standards and become distressed when you make even a small mistake at work or school. You continually beat yourself up, seek reassurance from others that your error wasn’t too bad, or vow to be even more careful going forward.
Practice: Think of one thing you did well today.
3. You worry others judge you negatively and don’t like you. You are on the lookout for any signs of negative judgment.
Practice: Recall one instance when someone gave you unequivocal positive feedback (e.g., gave you a smile and said hi, asked for your help or advice, or gave you a compliment).
4. You are preoccupied with negative thoughts about your body. You zero in on parts of your body you don’t like.
Practice: Find one aspect of your body you like. Look at it and allow yourself to like it.
5. You played in a sports competition. You can’t stop thinking about a play that didn’t go as well as you hoped. You withdraw from your teammates and think about quitting the sport.
Practice: Accept that you struggled, as every professional or amateur athlete does. Then recall one play, shot, or ball you handled well.
6. You wake up in a negative mood and think about the long day ahead. You fixate on how awful the day will be and wish it were over before it started.
Practice: Consider one aspect of your day that has the potential to be enjoyable or uplifting (e.g., a person you enjoy talking to).
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