In the adventure that is parenting, I try very hard not to impose my choices on my 15-year-old. She is she, and I am me, and we don’t have to make the same decisions. But isn’t it frustrating to have the benefit of hindsight, with no way of gifting our kids the learnings?

With this as our landscape, my daughter and I are in a constant dialogue about exercise. Specifically running. More specifically, her lack thereof.

“I wouldn’t be who I am without running. I wouldn’t have thought of most of my ideas.” Credit: ISTOCK

I am an avid runner. She’s not so into it. She’ll do it, for sport. But as an activity in itself, no. And that’s fine, of course. It’s not for everybody and she’s her own person. If she wants to spend almost every minute horizontal with a screen, to the extent I fear her body will atrophy, that’s her business.

But what kills me is that I was exactly like her. I actually made a dinner-time declaration to my family that running hurts, I’m no good at it, and I intend to never lift my pace above a brisk walk.

But when I was 30, anxiety and general life malaise caught up with me. I remember reading a thing about running and mental health, which led me to think, “I wonder if I can run one kilometre?” Answer: no. Not at that moment. But I made the decision that I would try to be a runner. And it was one of the best decisions I ever made.

It wasn’t easy. I added 500 metres every time I ran, and sometimes cried from the effort. I’ve since run a marathon (15 years ago, but you’re still allowed to brag until your deathbed) and a handful of halfies.

I’ve come to a realisation: the best decisions we make in life can only really come from living, and our kids have only just begun.

I wouldn’t be who I am without running. I wouldn’t have thought of most of my ideas. I wouldn’t be as happy on my good days or cope as well on my bad ones. And because of running, I have undeniable evidence that I can set a very difficult goal, and via one tiny milestone at a time I will achieve that goal. The grit that is ingrained in me now is all because of that simple decision.

Of course, I’ve bored my kid senseless with all of that, partly hoping she might get so sick of it she runs from the house, suddenly loves the feeling, and maybe makes it around the block once or twice. But while out running, I’ve come to a realisation: the best decisions we make in life can only really come from living, and our kids have only just begun.